Some times you always feel happiness and laughter
And you think you're the only one who doesn't know what you're after
If everyone's perfect, then why aren't you?
And then you finally find out who's after you
Some one to chase
Some one to embrace
I just wanna waste
The death you face
I would break my heart to see what's inside
Then I'd find myself another place to hide
Feel all my feelings torturing all that was once mine
Then I would scream in pain even though I'm not divine
This is my horror crime
These restless feelings that lie in my chest
Is something I hope you know best
Sometimes I feel like I'm in a test
To be in heaven and forever peacefully rest
Some one to chase
Some one to embrace
I just wanna waste
The death you face
I would break my heart to see what's inside
Then I'd find myself another place to hide
Feel all my feelings torturing all that was once mine
Then I would scream in pain even though I'm not divine
This is my horror crime
I'm heading to the end of the road
My footsteps finally feel so cold
My skin releases from my soul
But I wanted you to know
I would break my heart to see what's inside
Then I'd find myself another place to hide
Feel all my feelings torturing all that was once mine
Then I would scream in pain even though I'm not divine
This is my horror crime
domingo, 3 de abril de 2011
Death O'Clock
He sees death in her eyes
Getting nervous as time passes by
He waits by the light
Goes to the hospital everyday
Before it's too late
But it was already that damned hour
A dead flower
Beside her bed
It was a already time
Her soul might saved
As her heartbeats became slower
She regretted the choice she made
He cried while he held her hand
Made promises she couldn't understand
But it was the time (it was the time)
That he couldn't stop
Oh no, it's death o'clock
She waited by the window everyday
She suffered with her useless fate
He couldn't stop loving her
He would give his heart for her cure
And everytime he touched her, a tear would fall
But every minute didn't matter
She would die a little after
It was a already time
Her soul might saved
As her heartbeats became slower
She regretted the choice she made
He cried while he held her hand
Made promises she couldn't understand
But it was the time (it was the time)
That he couldn't stop
Oh no, it's death o'clock
Together they thought they could solve all problems
They were so wrong
They had to be strong
As they held hands they trembled
He was fighting to be hy her side
She was crying 'cause she didn't want to leave tonight
It was a already time
Her soul might saved
As her heartbeats became slower
She regretted the choice she made
He cried while he held her hand
Made promises she couldn't understand
But it was the time (it was the time)
That he couldn't stop
Oh no, it's death o'clock
Every moment didn't matter anymore
It wouldn't be the same as before
He would suffer for all his life
She would say with her last breath
That she didn't love him
A lie that would make him forget
So he could move on without needing to love her
Without needing to blame himself
For what he couldn't do for her
So that he could move on (could move on)
But it didn't work
Getting nervous as time passes by
He waits by the light
Goes to the hospital everyday
Before it's too late
But it was already that damned hour
A dead flower
Beside her bed
It was a already time
Her soul might saved
As her heartbeats became slower
She regretted the choice she made
He cried while he held her hand
Made promises she couldn't understand
But it was the time (it was the time)
That he couldn't stop
Oh no, it's death o'clock
She waited by the window everyday
She suffered with her useless fate
He couldn't stop loving her
He would give his heart for her cure
And everytime he touched her, a tear would fall
But every minute didn't matter
She would die a little after
It was a already time
Her soul might saved
As her heartbeats became slower
She regretted the choice she made
He cried while he held her hand
Made promises she couldn't understand
But it was the time (it was the time)
That he couldn't stop
Oh no, it's death o'clock
Together they thought they could solve all problems
They were so wrong
They had to be strong
As they held hands they trembled
He was fighting to be hy her side
She was crying 'cause she didn't want to leave tonight
It was a already time
Her soul might saved
As her heartbeats became slower
She regretted the choice she made
He cried while he held her hand
Made promises she couldn't understand
But it was the time (it was the time)
That he couldn't stop
Oh no, it's death o'clock
Every moment didn't matter anymore
It wouldn't be the same as before
He would suffer for all his life
She would say with her last breath
That she didn't love him
A lie that would make him forget
So he could move on without needing to love her
Without needing to blame himself
For what he couldn't do for her
So that he could move on (could move on)
But it didn't work
terça-feira, 29 de março de 2011
The Devil's Angel
The Devil's Angel
Chapter I
Creampuffs
It was the first day of school. Her first day of being a third year. The auburn haired girl inhaled the fresh breeze that played with her hair. She was standing just outside of the entrance of Deimon High School, in the middle of the crowd that was in front of the list of students that had made it to the next year. Of course she was one of those students, but she wanted to check which class she was in. Lost in thoughts and trying to see the list, she didn't notice the tall figure beside her.
“Kekeke...” Mamori heard a familiar laugh, and couldn't help but smile, stopping the effort to see the list. During the winter break, she kind of missed that.
“What's so funny, Hiruma-kun?” And turned to look at him, with her lips pursed into a smile. She was predicting that something offensive was going to come out of his mouth after she said that. He looked at her, with that devilish grin he always had.
“We're in the same class.” He sounded amused, now holding a piece of sugar-free hum near his mouth. Still looking at him, she opened her mouth to answer, but he just turned and walked away from her, leaving her there standing alone. She wondered why he even bothered to help her, if he was just going to walk away like that.
Mamori decided to follow him, curious and wanting to see how he was, but she heard someone calling her name. Looking behind her, she saw two of her friends waving: Chizu and Kimiko. Chizu had brown short hair, while Kimiko had beautiful and long black hair. The quarterback was quickly forgotten as she went towards them.
Her third year started casually, just like the previous years. Opening ceremony, some new student introductions, lunch... Only that something was definitely different, and she already knew what it was.
“Aww, Mamori's bento is always so tidy and well made!” Chizu, one of her friends, whined, looking at Mamori's lunch that was made perfectly. Mamori laughed at the compliment, happy and proud of her work. Holding her chopsticks in her hand, unaware of what she was doing, she drifted her eyes over to the blond quarterback. He was sitting at his table with his laptop, and she wondered what he would have for lunch. He was probably going to buy food when he finished using it.
Mamori's eyebrows turned into a frown. She was starting to get worried, but realized that it wasn't any of her business anymore. She had nothing to do with him now. Absolutely nothing. After all, both her and Hiruma weren't going to be in the Devil Bats. She sighed, and lowered her head to stare her bento, because despite that, she was still worrying about him.
“Mamori?” Chizu called her out. “What's wrong?” Mamori widened her eyes, noticing she drifted away and quickly turned back to reality. She put one of her hands over her mouth, being polite, and laughed awkwardly.
“Oh! Nothing, nothing.” Mamori gave her friend a fake smile, trying to avoid a conversation about her thoughts. It would be a problem if she talked about it, and she wasn't even certain herself about how she felt about it yet.
“Eeh? But you were looking at the devil with a sad face about a minute ago!” One of the other girls, Kimiko, pointed out, in an accusing tone.
“Yeah! You're still scared of him, aren't you?” Chizu agreed and added, Mamori turned back to her, unable to respond, her eyebrows lifted up in surprise. “But don't worry, this year you don't have extracurricular activities, so you don't have to go to that American Football club again!”
“And you don't need to follow that devil's orders either!” Kimiko complemented, agreeing with her friend, a small laugh came after she said that. “You know I thought you had a crush on him?” Chizu, on the other side of the table, started to laugh along on how absurd that sounded.
Mamori sat there, with her chopsticks in her hand, speechless. Her expression was still of surprise, but inside she was falling apart. They would never know how much that meant to her, and she would never be able to explain how much it was. Just by hearing that, it hurt and pained her deeply. She looked down towards her bento one more time.
“Well...” Decided to talk, she looked back to them, mumbling off her first words. All eyes were on her, and realizing that made her nervous. “He isn't that bad...” What was she saying? “I meant to say: it wasn't that bad.” She corrected herself quickly, blushing.
“Wasn't that bad, are you kidding?” Chizu asked in disbelief.
And then Mamori's face lightened up, a true smile formed on her lips. She looked away, losing herself in thoughts one more time. “It was fun, actually... Really fun.”
She was going to miss it. Miss all of it very much. She would always watch the games, cheer for Sena and the others... But it wouldn't be the same thing. The adrenaline would never be the same, since she wasn't going to be the manager and wasn't going to be a member of the Devil Bats. She wouldn't ever be able to help them like she helped Hiruma on the field... Mamori had a sudden urge to cry: her best years were over. She shook her head, thinking about that would be no use, not at that moment, and returned to her conversation with her friends.
Finally at the last class, her teacher dismissed all his students and her first school day ended. She put her stuff back in her bag, saying that her friends could go ahead without her. She needed a time to think, and wasn't in mood for girl talk anymore. She went outside the school building alone. Her thoughts turned back to what she was thinking at lunch, as she looked forwards.
“Hey, fucking manager.” He was the last thing she needed at the moment, hearing his voice call her just as she walked down the front stairs. Interrupting her thoughts, her heart gave a leap surprised, and turned to him. What could he possibly want? “You're going out with me today.” He announced, grinning maliciously.
“W-What?!” She muttered, blood rushing through her cheeks, she couldn't believe what she just heard. He said that, right? He just said she was going out on a date with him, didn't he?
Hiruma laughed hysterically at her reaction, making her incredibly uncomfortable, and blush even more. “Stop thinking shit. We're going to decide our substitutes.” Her heart slowly started beating normally again, and her expression turned to anger. He shouldn't surprise her like that!
“You jerk!” Mamori shouted to him annoyed and still blushing.
“I'll call you later, kekeke.” He laughed as he walked away from her again. Mamori watched him do so and sighed, her hand now rested on her chest. Her heartbeats were normal, but she was still uneasy with what just happened. Her thoughts on her way home were more of why she felt that way when talking to him, and her mood started to get better.
The afternoon passed, and Mamori caught herself getting anxious. Not that she wanted desperately to go out on a date with him, as she said to herself a thousand times, but she was curious to discuss the matters with him, and tried to convince herself merely of this. In the end, she didn't receive a call from him, but received a text message with the time and place. Unfortunately she only had about an hour to get ready.
Seeing that, she rushed towards the bathroom, taking a quick shower. Why didn't he send that earlier!? But it wasn't like she didn't see that coming. Putting on some light makeup, choosing her clothes, she was still deciding what shoe to wear. Her decisions had to be made quickly or she would be late, and she was sure he didn't tolerate bad timing.
'This isn't a date, so I don't need to be so worried...' She was saying to herself so she would calm down, and picking a pair of black sneakers that matched her loose yellow shirt and jeans.
Mamori was worried, but arrived just in time, so she didn't have to hear him complaining about her punctuality. But even so, that made him amused in some sort of way. He looked casual, wearing a dark blue long sleeved shirt, that had somewhat of heavy metal band print on it with dark jeans. She couldn't help to smell his acidly scented cologne and get the feeling that they were on a date, despite what he said. As they walked beside one another, he also noticed that she didn't look bad herself and also smelled good, passing by stores and with their shoes stepping on the sidewalk. Not much was said at the start, with him being quiet, Mamori didn't know what to say.
“Why couldn't we do this at the clubhouse?” She finally asked, curiously. It was useless to ask that, he probably had a good reason not to meet her up at the clubhouse, probably because everyone would eavesdrop, but she still wanted to hear his answer and start a conversation. The silence between them was starting to annoy her.
“Kekeke.” Hiruma laughed, to her surprise. What was so funny? “Afraid your futile friends are going to find out you're with me?” His bubble gum popped as soon as these words came out of his mouth. Mamori's cheeks turned pink.
“They're not futile!” She defended them, trying to ignore the other part of the phrase he just said. The truth is that she actually didn't know what to answer.
“What was that talking during lunch today, then?” Hiruma said, catching her off guard, even though he wasn't even looking in her eyes. She blushed even harder, remembering on what she said during lunch and what her friends said during lunch. He heard them!
“That was...!” Couldn't she formulate an answer?
“Thought so.” He couldn't help it, he enjoyed teasing her too much. His mouth turned into a grin until he laughed in a way only he could. “Kekeke.” He went inside a coffee store down the street, ignoring Mamori's complains on him being a jerk for eavesdropping her girl talk with her friends. As soon as he went inside the coffee store, she followed him inside.
Hiruma drew his eyes at her and sat a table, waiting for her to join him. She sat at his front, still annoyed and avoiding looking at him, so her eyes looked around where they had entered. The place was pretty nice, valuing the white color, with several tables. They were on the one that was exactly beside the huge glass window that gave Hiruma complete view of the street.
Her eyes stopped at the counter, that showed all kinds of sweets they had. There was a huge variations of colors, sizes and types, and she saw... Creampuffs. Involuntarily, her mouth started watering from the desire of eating those sweets. Was that the reason he brought her there?
“May I take your orders?” A woman dressed in white came to them, asking Hiruma first, with a pen in her right hand and a writing pad on the other. Mamori waited patiently for her turn, as she looked at the menu.
“One pure black coffee and ten creampuffs.” He said, not paying much attention to the waitress. His lips turned into a grin when Mamori looked at him with an irritated expression, offended. But she turned away from him and looked towards the menu again. If he was paying, she wasn't going to turn down ten creampuffs. The waitress didn't even bother to take Mamori's order and just left.
“You're gonna get fucking fat.” Hiruma teased, laughing at her and breaking the silence that was formed between them. Mamori directed her blue eyes back to him one more time, irritated.
“I know how to take care of myself, Hiruma-kun.” She answered annoyed, her hands put the menu back on the table. He really got on her nerves! The waitress finally came to them with their orders and put them on the table, managing to wink to the blond quarterback while doing it. Mamori immediately noticed the flirtatious act and looked towards him to see how he would react to that. He had grinned towards the waitress, making Mamori clear her throat loudly, glaring at the blond woman with a 'you can leave now' look. The woman just rolled her eyes, picking the menus from the table.
“Why do we have to do this?” She asked suddenly, to gain Hiruma's attention back and making the waitress leave. He sipped his coffee with a grin on his face, noticing what his manager had just done. While eating her creampuff, he didn't answer anything and continued looking at her entertained. She thought that she hadn't been clear enough. “I mean...” She started off again, the rest of the phrase was harder to admit, and she felt her hands getting shaky. “We don't have anything to do with the team anymore.” Mamori put her hands back on the table gently, as if to calm herself. Hiruma observed the movement of her hands, and then looked back at her eyes. Those words had struck her more than she could imagine. It was so easy to say it, but when she thought about what they meant, she felt terrible.
Blue eyes looked at him, hopeless. As if those eyes were desperately asking him for a solution. Asking him to say that this was not the end – not the end for both of them –. He turned away, with that unexpected speech of hers, he didn't want to face those blue orbs. It made him regret what he was about to say, so he continued to look at the street.
“This is as far as you go.” Hiruma said, serious, now with his coffee finished. He didn't go easy on her, and he knew he could have done that. It was cruel, but he couldn't help it, it was part of who he was.
Mamori looked to her lap and felt an emptiness inside her. Someone had to say that to her, but why did it have to be him out of all people? She breathed deeply, clenching her fists, and didn't let any tears fall down. She looked up to him again, decided to face him and not feel so bad about what he just said. Hiruma underestimated her, he thought that she was going to cry.
“So you already decided who the new team captain is?” Mamori managed to say. Her voice was failing on her, she was trying hard to recompose herself. She started eating another creampuff that was on her plate.
“If you already know the answer, don't ask.” Hiruma replied, unaffected, even though she gained more respect from him by not crying.
“I think I know who should be the team manager.” She announced, finally recomposed, as she finished eating, and then picked up another creampuff.
“Stop fucking eating and spit it out.” He ordered, impatient.
“Suzuna-chan.” She said, and then called the waitress, to her disgust, and asked for a paper bag to put the rest of the creampuffs inside.
“She's the fucking cheerleader.” Hiruma said, paying the waitress as both of them got up and directed themselves out of the store. He had ignored the blond woman, and that somewhat made Mamori feel victorious and powerful.
“I know, but don't you think she's the most fit for the job?” Mamori asked, carrying her little bag of creampuffs in her hands. He didn't answer her question, and it looked like he was thinking about it while looking towards the street. “Aren't you going to say anything?” She continued walking by his side as he still ignored her, putting a sugar-free gum in his mouth. “So you agree that it should be her?”
“Shut up and eat your fucking creampuffs.”
--
Depois eu edito e posto o link dessa história no fanfiction.net(só vou postar dps que eu acabar de passar a história toda pro computador). Faz tempo que eu dizia que ia postar no blog, mas eu não conseguia ficar completamente satisfeita com esse capítulo, o que ainda não estou. Então, arpoveita ae
Outro detalhe importante: a maioria das coisas postadas aqui agora serão em inglês :(
Chapter I
Creampuffs
It was the first day of school. Her first day of being a third year. The auburn haired girl inhaled the fresh breeze that played with her hair. She was standing just outside of the entrance of Deimon High School, in the middle of the crowd that was in front of the list of students that had made it to the next year. Of course she was one of those students, but she wanted to check which class she was in. Lost in thoughts and trying to see the list, she didn't notice the tall figure beside her.
“Kekeke...” Mamori heard a familiar laugh, and couldn't help but smile, stopping the effort to see the list. During the winter break, she kind of missed that.
“What's so funny, Hiruma-kun?” And turned to look at him, with her lips pursed into a smile. She was predicting that something offensive was going to come out of his mouth after she said that. He looked at her, with that devilish grin he always had.
“We're in the same class.” He sounded amused, now holding a piece of sugar-free hum near his mouth. Still looking at him, she opened her mouth to answer, but he just turned and walked away from her, leaving her there standing alone. She wondered why he even bothered to help her, if he was just going to walk away like that.
Mamori decided to follow him, curious and wanting to see how he was, but she heard someone calling her name. Looking behind her, she saw two of her friends waving: Chizu and Kimiko. Chizu had brown short hair, while Kimiko had beautiful and long black hair. The quarterback was quickly forgotten as she went towards them.
Her third year started casually, just like the previous years. Opening ceremony, some new student introductions, lunch... Only that something was definitely different, and she already knew what it was.
“Aww, Mamori's bento is always so tidy and well made!” Chizu, one of her friends, whined, looking at Mamori's lunch that was made perfectly. Mamori laughed at the compliment, happy and proud of her work. Holding her chopsticks in her hand, unaware of what she was doing, she drifted her eyes over to the blond quarterback. He was sitting at his table with his laptop, and she wondered what he would have for lunch. He was probably going to buy food when he finished using it.
Mamori's eyebrows turned into a frown. She was starting to get worried, but realized that it wasn't any of her business anymore. She had nothing to do with him now. Absolutely nothing. After all, both her and Hiruma weren't going to be in the Devil Bats. She sighed, and lowered her head to stare her bento, because despite that, she was still worrying about him.
“Mamori?” Chizu called her out. “What's wrong?” Mamori widened her eyes, noticing she drifted away and quickly turned back to reality. She put one of her hands over her mouth, being polite, and laughed awkwardly.
“Oh! Nothing, nothing.” Mamori gave her friend a fake smile, trying to avoid a conversation about her thoughts. It would be a problem if she talked about it, and she wasn't even certain herself about how she felt about it yet.
“Eeh? But you were looking at the devil with a sad face about a minute ago!” One of the other girls, Kimiko, pointed out, in an accusing tone.
“Yeah! You're still scared of him, aren't you?” Chizu agreed and added, Mamori turned back to her, unable to respond, her eyebrows lifted up in surprise. “But don't worry, this year you don't have extracurricular activities, so you don't have to go to that American Football club again!”
“And you don't need to follow that devil's orders either!” Kimiko complemented, agreeing with her friend, a small laugh came after she said that. “You know I thought you had a crush on him?” Chizu, on the other side of the table, started to laugh along on how absurd that sounded.
Mamori sat there, with her chopsticks in her hand, speechless. Her expression was still of surprise, but inside she was falling apart. They would never know how much that meant to her, and she would never be able to explain how much it was. Just by hearing that, it hurt and pained her deeply. She looked down towards her bento one more time.
“Well...” Decided to talk, she looked back to them, mumbling off her first words. All eyes were on her, and realizing that made her nervous. “He isn't that bad...” What was she saying? “I meant to say: it wasn't that bad.” She corrected herself quickly, blushing.
“Wasn't that bad, are you kidding?” Chizu asked in disbelief.
And then Mamori's face lightened up, a true smile formed on her lips. She looked away, losing herself in thoughts one more time. “It was fun, actually... Really fun.”
She was going to miss it. Miss all of it very much. She would always watch the games, cheer for Sena and the others... But it wouldn't be the same thing. The adrenaline would never be the same, since she wasn't going to be the manager and wasn't going to be a member of the Devil Bats. She wouldn't ever be able to help them like she helped Hiruma on the field... Mamori had a sudden urge to cry: her best years were over. She shook her head, thinking about that would be no use, not at that moment, and returned to her conversation with her friends.
Finally at the last class, her teacher dismissed all his students and her first school day ended. She put her stuff back in her bag, saying that her friends could go ahead without her. She needed a time to think, and wasn't in mood for girl talk anymore. She went outside the school building alone. Her thoughts turned back to what she was thinking at lunch, as she looked forwards.
“Hey, fucking manager.” He was the last thing she needed at the moment, hearing his voice call her just as she walked down the front stairs. Interrupting her thoughts, her heart gave a leap surprised, and turned to him. What could he possibly want? “You're going out with me today.” He announced, grinning maliciously.
“W-What?!” She muttered, blood rushing through her cheeks, she couldn't believe what she just heard. He said that, right? He just said she was going out on a date with him, didn't he?
Hiruma laughed hysterically at her reaction, making her incredibly uncomfortable, and blush even more. “Stop thinking shit. We're going to decide our substitutes.” Her heart slowly started beating normally again, and her expression turned to anger. He shouldn't surprise her like that!
“You jerk!” Mamori shouted to him annoyed and still blushing.
“I'll call you later, kekeke.” He laughed as he walked away from her again. Mamori watched him do so and sighed, her hand now rested on her chest. Her heartbeats were normal, but she was still uneasy with what just happened. Her thoughts on her way home were more of why she felt that way when talking to him, and her mood started to get better.
The afternoon passed, and Mamori caught herself getting anxious. Not that she wanted desperately to go out on a date with him, as she said to herself a thousand times, but she was curious to discuss the matters with him, and tried to convince herself merely of this. In the end, she didn't receive a call from him, but received a text message with the time and place. Unfortunately she only had about an hour to get ready.
Seeing that, she rushed towards the bathroom, taking a quick shower. Why didn't he send that earlier!? But it wasn't like she didn't see that coming. Putting on some light makeup, choosing her clothes, she was still deciding what shoe to wear. Her decisions had to be made quickly or she would be late, and she was sure he didn't tolerate bad timing.
'This isn't a date, so I don't need to be so worried...' She was saying to herself so she would calm down, and picking a pair of black sneakers that matched her loose yellow shirt and jeans.
Mamori was worried, but arrived just in time, so she didn't have to hear him complaining about her punctuality. But even so, that made him amused in some sort of way. He looked casual, wearing a dark blue long sleeved shirt, that had somewhat of heavy metal band print on it with dark jeans. She couldn't help to smell his acidly scented cologne and get the feeling that they were on a date, despite what he said. As they walked beside one another, he also noticed that she didn't look bad herself and also smelled good, passing by stores and with their shoes stepping on the sidewalk. Not much was said at the start, with him being quiet, Mamori didn't know what to say.
“Why couldn't we do this at the clubhouse?” She finally asked, curiously. It was useless to ask that, he probably had a good reason not to meet her up at the clubhouse, probably because everyone would eavesdrop, but she still wanted to hear his answer and start a conversation. The silence between them was starting to annoy her.
“Kekeke.” Hiruma laughed, to her surprise. What was so funny? “Afraid your futile friends are going to find out you're with me?” His bubble gum popped as soon as these words came out of his mouth. Mamori's cheeks turned pink.
“They're not futile!” She defended them, trying to ignore the other part of the phrase he just said. The truth is that she actually didn't know what to answer.
“What was that talking during lunch today, then?” Hiruma said, catching her off guard, even though he wasn't even looking in her eyes. She blushed even harder, remembering on what she said during lunch and what her friends said during lunch. He heard them!
“That was...!” Couldn't she formulate an answer?
“Thought so.” He couldn't help it, he enjoyed teasing her too much. His mouth turned into a grin until he laughed in a way only he could. “Kekeke.” He went inside a coffee store down the street, ignoring Mamori's complains on him being a jerk for eavesdropping her girl talk with her friends. As soon as he went inside the coffee store, she followed him inside.
Hiruma drew his eyes at her and sat a table, waiting for her to join him. She sat at his front, still annoyed and avoiding looking at him, so her eyes looked around where they had entered. The place was pretty nice, valuing the white color, with several tables. They were on the one that was exactly beside the huge glass window that gave Hiruma complete view of the street.
Her eyes stopped at the counter, that showed all kinds of sweets they had. There was a huge variations of colors, sizes and types, and she saw... Creampuffs. Involuntarily, her mouth started watering from the desire of eating those sweets. Was that the reason he brought her there?
“May I take your orders?” A woman dressed in white came to them, asking Hiruma first, with a pen in her right hand and a writing pad on the other. Mamori waited patiently for her turn, as she looked at the menu.
“One pure black coffee and ten creampuffs.” He said, not paying much attention to the waitress. His lips turned into a grin when Mamori looked at him with an irritated expression, offended. But she turned away from him and looked towards the menu again. If he was paying, she wasn't going to turn down ten creampuffs. The waitress didn't even bother to take Mamori's order and just left.
“You're gonna get fucking fat.” Hiruma teased, laughing at her and breaking the silence that was formed between them. Mamori directed her blue eyes back to him one more time, irritated.
“I know how to take care of myself, Hiruma-kun.” She answered annoyed, her hands put the menu back on the table. He really got on her nerves! The waitress finally came to them with their orders and put them on the table, managing to wink to the blond quarterback while doing it. Mamori immediately noticed the flirtatious act and looked towards him to see how he would react to that. He had grinned towards the waitress, making Mamori clear her throat loudly, glaring at the blond woman with a 'you can leave now' look. The woman just rolled her eyes, picking the menus from the table.
“Why do we have to do this?” She asked suddenly, to gain Hiruma's attention back and making the waitress leave. He sipped his coffee with a grin on his face, noticing what his manager had just done. While eating her creampuff, he didn't answer anything and continued looking at her entertained. She thought that she hadn't been clear enough. “I mean...” She started off again, the rest of the phrase was harder to admit, and she felt her hands getting shaky. “We don't have anything to do with the team anymore.” Mamori put her hands back on the table gently, as if to calm herself. Hiruma observed the movement of her hands, and then looked back at her eyes. Those words had struck her more than she could imagine. It was so easy to say it, but when she thought about what they meant, she felt terrible.
Blue eyes looked at him, hopeless. As if those eyes were desperately asking him for a solution. Asking him to say that this was not the end – not the end for both of them –. He turned away, with that unexpected speech of hers, he didn't want to face those blue orbs. It made him regret what he was about to say, so he continued to look at the street.
“This is as far as you go.” Hiruma said, serious, now with his coffee finished. He didn't go easy on her, and he knew he could have done that. It was cruel, but he couldn't help it, it was part of who he was.
Mamori looked to her lap and felt an emptiness inside her. Someone had to say that to her, but why did it have to be him out of all people? She breathed deeply, clenching her fists, and didn't let any tears fall down. She looked up to him again, decided to face him and not feel so bad about what he just said. Hiruma underestimated her, he thought that she was going to cry.
“So you already decided who the new team captain is?” Mamori managed to say. Her voice was failing on her, she was trying hard to recompose herself. She started eating another creampuff that was on her plate.
“If you already know the answer, don't ask.” Hiruma replied, unaffected, even though she gained more respect from him by not crying.
“I think I know who should be the team manager.” She announced, finally recomposed, as she finished eating, and then picked up another creampuff.
“Stop fucking eating and spit it out.” He ordered, impatient.
“Suzuna-chan.” She said, and then called the waitress, to her disgust, and asked for a paper bag to put the rest of the creampuffs inside.
“She's the fucking cheerleader.” Hiruma said, paying the waitress as both of them got up and directed themselves out of the store. He had ignored the blond woman, and that somewhat made Mamori feel victorious and powerful.
“I know, but don't you think she's the most fit for the job?” Mamori asked, carrying her little bag of creampuffs in her hands. He didn't answer her question, and it looked like he was thinking about it while looking towards the street. “Aren't you going to say anything?” She continued walking by his side as he still ignored her, putting a sugar-free gum in his mouth. “So you agree that it should be her?”
“Shut up and eat your fucking creampuffs.”
--
Depois eu edito e posto o link dessa história no fanfiction.net(só vou postar dps que eu acabar de passar a história toda pro computador). Faz tempo que eu dizia que ia postar no blog, mas eu não conseguia ficar completamente satisfeita com esse capítulo, o que ainda não estou. Então, arpoveita ae
Outro detalhe importante: a maioria das coisas postadas aqui agora serão em inglês :(
quinta-feira, 14 de outubro de 2010
Censura
E se pensar fosse uma profissão?
Eu poderia pensar em todas as cores do céu ao dia,
Que cores poderiam fluir de uma harmonia,
Cores que misturaria para mudar uma melodia.
Poderia pensar nas pessoas ao meu redor:
Tantos rostos felizes, tristes, doloridos ou cheios de dó,
Que todos os problemas poderiam estar em uma pessoa só.
Poderia pensar em crianças,
Crianças que não precisam pagar fianças
Ou cobranças,
Acham que um pé de feijão ao céu alcança.
Poderia pensar em religião:
Católico, judeu, budista, hindu, islamita, protestante, xintoísta, pagão
Vivendo na própria ilusão
Imaginação
Ou razão
Poderia pensar no planeta Terra,
Perceber o quanto o ser humano erra:
Seja na paz, doença ou guerra.
Poderia pensar sobre o pensar,
Sobre o propósito de amar,
Falar.
E se pensar
Se pensar fosse uma profissão
Eu poderia pensar
Eu poderia pensar em todas as cores do céu ao dia,
Que cores poderiam fluir de uma harmonia,
Cores que misturaria para mudar uma melodia.
Poderia pensar nas pessoas ao meu redor:
Tantos rostos felizes, tristes, doloridos ou cheios de dó,
Que todos os problemas poderiam estar em uma pessoa só.
Poderia pensar em crianças,
Crianças que não precisam pagar fianças
Ou cobranças,
Acham que um pé de feijão ao céu alcança.
Poderia pensar em religião:
Católico, judeu, budista, hindu, islamita, protestante, xintoísta, pagão
Vivendo na própria ilusão
Imaginação
Ou razão
Poderia pensar no planeta Terra,
Perceber o quanto o ser humano erra:
Seja na paz, doença ou guerra.
Poderia pensar sobre o pensar,
Sobre o propósito de amar,
Falar.
E se pensar
Se pensar fosse uma profissão
Eu poderia pensar
domingo, 3 de outubro de 2010
Gray Sky
Look at the leaves while they fall down
How the wind blows without making a sound
The borders of a book dirty by rain
And as my little heart jumps I’ll go insane
Tears that fall leaving the sky
With the gray clouds up so high
I’ll catch my breath as I pass aside
Letting the wind blow me dry
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
I see the gray sky
That makes me wanna cry
I wish I had telepathy
So I could read your unreadable mind
I wanted to solve all the mysteries
Discover all I could find
Just now, right now
I wanted to be your friend
Maybe I wanted to be your lover
I hope I can decide until the song is over
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
I see the gray sky
That makes me wanna cry
Dreams and nightmares
Shallows, empties, dark and gray
A feeling that you might not stay
The candle by the window
My memories slowly fade away
The feeling that comes in my chest
The thing that makes me feel so uneasy
I keep it in my throat and hold my breath
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
I see the gray sky
That makes me wanna cry
In my own room with no light
How can I save people?
Why is it that I have a life?
No purpose, no meaning
If I did something right
I’ll always be illuminated by candlelight
The tears I want to dry
Won’t stop to fall
Even though I wipe it hard
My problems seem so small
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
I see the gray sky
That makes me wanna cry
And I see the gray sky that makes me want to cry…
How the wind blows without making a sound
The borders of a book dirty by rain
And as my little heart jumps I’ll go insane
Tears that fall leaving the sky
With the gray clouds up so high
I’ll catch my breath as I pass aside
Letting the wind blow me dry
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
I see the gray sky
That makes me wanna cry
I wish I had telepathy
So I could read your unreadable mind
I wanted to solve all the mysteries
Discover all I could find
Just now, right now
I wanted to be your friend
Maybe I wanted to be your lover
I hope I can decide until the song is over
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
I see the gray sky
That makes me wanna cry
Dreams and nightmares
Shallows, empties, dark and gray
A feeling that you might not stay
The candle by the window
My memories slowly fade away
The feeling that comes in my chest
The thing that makes me feel so uneasy
I keep it in my throat and hold my breath
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
I see the gray sky
That makes me wanna cry
In my own room with no light
How can I save people?
Why is it that I have a life?
No purpose, no meaning
If I did something right
I’ll always be illuminated by candlelight
The tears I want to dry
Won’t stop to fall
Even though I wipe it hard
My problems seem so small
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
As I hope I move along
Even though I write this song
It maybe impossible to forget
Impossible to remember
The best thing I felt yet
I see the gray sky
That makes me wanna cry
And I see the gray sky that makes me want to cry…
They just can't keep themselves from hurting each other
“DAMN!” Draco punched the mirror in the monitor's bathroom. He was so angry he couldn't even think straight. Tears were almost about to roll down his face, his head was going to explode. “I HATE YOU FATHER!” He exclaimed again, and punched the mirror one more time, and making sure it hit his reflex.
As his fist rested on the mirror, tears started falling on his face. He couldn't take it anymore, it was too much pressure on him. His father would beat him up many times saying that he was useless, even though he tried so hard to be better in what he is. He really couldn't take it anymore.
He punched the mirror one more time, this time it was so hard it broke. Pieces of glass stuck now on his hand. Blood spilled all over the sink.
But he couldn't feel it.
He didn't feel any of it.
He sank on the bathroom floor, the tears had finally stopped falling. He was so ridiculous, from all of things he had to do, the only thing he did was cry in the bathroom and manage to break a mirror.
He wanted to die.
He heard a splash somewhere in the bathroom, and quickly looked around to see what it was. It was no one less than Loony Luna.
“What the fuck are you doing here?!” He yelled, furious at her. She turned around to look at him.
He noticed that there were tears on her eyes too. He stood there, looking at her. It must have been a dreadful sight, seeing him all covered in blood, sitting on a bathroom floor with broken glass all around him. But she wasn't supposed to be there. She wasn't supposed to see him like this.
She came towards him.
“Get away from me!” He ordered, screaming at her face as his wet blond hair bounced by the impact. If his hands weren't numb, he would punch her on the face for being so nosy.
As she got closer, she leaned down to him and caught one of his hands. He was still swearing at her, calling her the nastiest names possible. But she didn't care. She started pulling out all the shards from his hands. He screamed, clenched his teeth, but it didn't stop her from doing it. When she finished doing it to both his hands, she took her handkerchief, put some water on it and cleaned his cuts. She casted a spell to do the rest of the cleaning job on him, taking off all of the blood on his clothes and also made one to cure his wounds.
He immediately pushed her away after she did that and got up.
“What the fuck did you do this for?!” Draco was still furious. How could anyone dare to see him in his state? She should have just forgotten him! Left him there! “You're so disappointing, even though I'm such an asshole to you, you still help me! Are you that stupid?!” And he was so angry at her. How could someone be like her? Getting picked on and not doing nothing. Treating and caring for a guy that was such a jerk to her. He couldn't stand her. He couldn't stand people like her. It made him remember himself.
He took her handkerchief away.
She was still on her knees, biting her inferior lip. She would regret this later.
“I'm not like you...” She murmured, about to cry. But she wasn't going to. She couldn't. Not in front of someone like him.
“Huh, what did you say?” He asked, irritated. “Thought I heard something.”
“I said I'm not like you.” She got up and gave him a little smile, that wasn't fake as it seemed to be. It was more of a proud-of-what-she-did like smile. She managed to be stronger than her pride and proven that she's a much better person than she thought she'd be.
“Pfft.. Crazy.” He gave her his back, angry. And was about to leave the bathroom, “If you tell anyone what you've seen today, you'll regret to ever have been born.”, turned his back at her and left towards the corridor.
After he closed violently the door behind him, she fell on her knees.
As if she were the one broken and not the mirror.
As his fist rested on the mirror, tears started falling on his face. He couldn't take it anymore, it was too much pressure on him. His father would beat him up many times saying that he was useless, even though he tried so hard to be better in what he is. He really couldn't take it anymore.
He punched the mirror one more time, this time it was so hard it broke. Pieces of glass stuck now on his hand. Blood spilled all over the sink.
But he couldn't feel it.
He didn't feel any of it.
He sank on the bathroom floor, the tears had finally stopped falling. He was so ridiculous, from all of things he had to do, the only thing he did was cry in the bathroom and manage to break a mirror.
He wanted to die.
He heard a splash somewhere in the bathroom, and quickly looked around to see what it was. It was no one less than Loony Luna.
“What the fuck are you doing here?!” He yelled, furious at her. She turned around to look at him.
He noticed that there were tears on her eyes too. He stood there, looking at her. It must have been a dreadful sight, seeing him all covered in blood, sitting on a bathroom floor with broken glass all around him. But she wasn't supposed to be there. She wasn't supposed to see him like this.
She came towards him.
“Get away from me!” He ordered, screaming at her face as his wet blond hair bounced by the impact. If his hands weren't numb, he would punch her on the face for being so nosy.
As she got closer, she leaned down to him and caught one of his hands. He was still swearing at her, calling her the nastiest names possible. But she didn't care. She started pulling out all the shards from his hands. He screamed, clenched his teeth, but it didn't stop her from doing it. When she finished doing it to both his hands, she took her handkerchief, put some water on it and cleaned his cuts. She casted a spell to do the rest of the cleaning job on him, taking off all of the blood on his clothes and also made one to cure his wounds.
He immediately pushed her away after she did that and got up.
“What the fuck did you do this for?!” Draco was still furious. How could anyone dare to see him in his state? She should have just forgotten him! Left him there! “You're so disappointing, even though I'm such an asshole to you, you still help me! Are you that stupid?!” And he was so angry at her. How could someone be like her? Getting picked on and not doing nothing. Treating and caring for a guy that was such a jerk to her. He couldn't stand her. He couldn't stand people like her. It made him remember himself.
He took her handkerchief away.
She was still on her knees, biting her inferior lip. She would regret this later.
“I'm not like you...” She murmured, about to cry. But she wasn't going to. She couldn't. Not in front of someone like him.
“Huh, what did you say?” He asked, irritated. “Thought I heard something.”
“I said I'm not like you.” She got up and gave him a little smile, that wasn't fake as it seemed to be. It was more of a proud-of-what-she-did like smile. She managed to be stronger than her pride and proven that she's a much better person than she thought she'd be.
“Pfft.. Crazy.” He gave her his back, angry. And was about to leave the bathroom, “If you tell anyone what you've seen today, you'll regret to ever have been born.”, turned his back at her and left towards the corridor.
After he closed violently the door behind him, she fell on her knees.
As if she were the one broken and not the mirror.
Noites no Cemitério
NOITE I
Era uma vez um garoto que gostava de ir ao cemitério.
Ia todas as noites antes da meia-noite. Não passava o tempo todo na frente de somente um túmulo, se interessava por todos. Sabia o nome de todas as pessoas que estavam enterradas ali. A cidade era pequena, então o cemitério não tinha segurança e o mesmo valia para a capela, que se alojava nela sempre que podia. Começou a frequentar o cemitério com cerca de 14 anos, depois que perdeu seu avô.
Gostava de ir para lá porque era um lugar calmo e tranquilo, e sabia que nunca seria perturbado ali. Afinal, quem ia pro cemitério no meio da noite? Ia para ler e estudar, mas não eram matérias de colégio. Suas leituras incluíam livros de ocultismo, grimórios de bruxos famosos, livros de demonologia, anjologia, vampiros... Tinha um enorme interesse por esses assuntos. Já tinha perdido a conta de quantos livros já tinha lido sobre isso.
Seu lugar preferido no cemitério era as escadas da capela. A igreja era alta, então suas escadas davam uma boa ideia do tamanho do cemitério. Para poder ler a noite, sempre acendia uma vela ao seu lado, nas escadas.
A lua estava cheia, alta no céu. As estrelas dançavam ao seu redor. Era uma vista agradável de se ver, enquanto caminhava na calçada de concreto até o cemitério. Não era muito longe de sua casa: provavelmente uma caminhada de vinte minutos. Estava segurando em uma de suas mãos um livro de necromancia e no seu outro ombro estava a alça de sua bolsa, em que carregava materiais para feitiços e poções de todo tipo.
O cemitério tinha duas entradas, já que era em uma esquina. Sempre entrava pela entrada da frente, que tinha um caminho direto para as escadas da igreja. A entrada da lateral era feita para visitar os túmulos, e o caminho era posicionado entre os próprios.
Enquanto passava pela entrada, pôde ver do outro lado do cemitério um túmulo recente. Provavelmente houve um funeral de dia. Deixou sua bolsa e seu livro nas escadas da capela e andou até o túmulo recente.
"Louise Andrews Foster
(1979 - 2010)
Mãe amada pelos filhos."
Não sabia quem era. Também, sua vida social era praticamente inexistente, passava a maior parte de seu tempo se escondendo das pessoas. Na escola era visto como o esquisito. Se metia em brigas mais que várias vezes, apanhava de vez em quando, mas quando lutava, ganhava. Isso deu às pessoas em sua escola uma imagem de medo à ele, ainda mais quando a escola era católica.
Depois de ter lido o nome, voltou às escadas e acendeu sua vela. Iria começar sua leitura. Estava a procura de um feitiço ou poção para reviver os mortos. Até agora em todos livros que tinha lido, tinha achado poucas referências, mas não iria desistir. Mas teria que achar um corpo para poder testá-lo...
Ouviu um barulho do outro lado do cemitério.
Não podia ver de onde estava vindo porque tinha o muro ao lado das escadas. Lentamente pôs a cabeça em cima do muro e viu o que estava acontecendo.
Uma garota estava na frente do túmulo recente. Percebeu que ela estava chorando e soluçando. Chorando muito alto, quase gritando. Dava até pena de ver uma garota tão bonita como ela chorando. Ela não fazia o mínimo esforço para enxugar suas lágrimas, só queria deixar escorrerem. Seus longos cabelos negros estavam assanhados, indicando que tinha vindo correndo. Naquele escuro, não se podia ver seus olhos.
"Essa deve ser a filha da defunta." Pensou, enquanto voltava a sua leitura. Infelizmente, ele fora interrompido. Não conseguia se concentrar por conta do barulho que ela estava fazendo.
A garota gritava do outro lado do muro.
"Porque você fez isso!? Porque você me deixou!?" Gritava e chorava. "EU TE ODEIO!" Começou a chorar mais baixo de novo, afundando o rosto em suas mãos.
Isso durou por cerca de uma hora, até que ela decidiu ir embora. O único pensamento que o garoto tinha em sua mente era:
"Finalmente."
Suspirou com alívio. Poderia voltar a sua leitura e pesquisa agora. Continuou lendo o livro até terminá-lo, o que foi cerca de três horas, já que estava na metade antes de chegar ao cemitério. Após isso voltou para casa pouco depois de três horas da manhã.
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